Phinter village is a part of Billawar tehsil in Kathua district which is about 115 kilometres from Jammu and is known all around the State due to the immense faith of the people in its presiding diety, Mata Sukrala Devi. Legend has it that the Pandavas were very attracted to the ubiquitous Bael or Bilwa trees in this area and spent one year here in exile. Thereafter, the place acquired its name ‘Billawar’. Our ancestral home in Phinter where my paternal grandparents lived also had a Bael tree whose leaves served as lord Shiva’s favourite tapestry. My grandmother was quite an interesting person. She was the only one in our family who had never been to school and had invented unique logics to provide to us kids for many things. Firstly, the anecdote of her birth needs to be told. As her birthdate was never known, she would tell us that babies don’t have bones and that she was dropped from the skies. She would go on to explain that it was also the reason why she grew up to be short heighted later in life. I would teach her to say words in English, like Coconut. She would say cutcut or something different every time. She would do this to make me feel elated over the extreme difficult knowledge I possessed at age 4 or 5. Her kitchen used to be lined up with big blue coloured plastic jars of Dalda ghee that had coconut trees printed on them. It could be the reason why I wanted to teach her the word coconut perhaps. I spent one year doing my schooling from Phinter while living with my grandparents during kindergarten. After this, our visits were limited to spending a considerable amount during summer breaks and celebrating important festivities together. 

 At 4 am dot during the summers, my grandfather would come to the front portion of the house and knock on the door. The  house had a kitchen, an enclosed hall and two small rooms. The courtyard was a plain square patch right outside of this which had Tulsi and flowerbeds and mint on its periphery. I can go on and on describing the place but let me first turn to tea. So my grandparents had a precise time and place for everything in the house and the same was true for tea. You could swear by the temple bell that if you came to our house at 4:30 in the morning or 4:30 in the evening it would always be time for tea. Once I was told by a very senior veteran in Jammu that when he was small, there used to be no medication for fever as such. People would be shut in a room and tea would be served to them to get the heat out of the body. Another Uncle of mine also gave me a tip about tea. He said that whenever going to a new place, we should have their tea first. This  acclimated us to the water of that place in a safe and boiled form. Thereafter, digesting meals from that place becomes easy. But when we were small, it was common to be discouraged from having tea. The households which have a routine of having tea, normally have some tricks and fixes for children who ask for tea. One of them is to take just a little bit of tea and put the rest of the milk in it to make a mug full of tea. This tea concoction pleases the child as she is allowed to become part of an adult activity.

 Tracing the root of inhibitions to having tea, one can consider that stimulants of any kind are considered tamsik in traditional Indian classification of food. Today we know scientifically that tea  has caffeine which is a nervous stimulant and should be avoided for longevity. This humble drink however keeps reinventing itself. Age-old traditions have found a rightful place in our houses in the age of pandemic. Tea is encouraged to be had with immune-boosters like tulsi, ginger, mulethi, saunf, lavang and other spices which promote throat health and rejuvenation. Tea has another special space in Indian households. It has the role of welcoming visitors and acting as a base for warm socialisation. Nobody can underrate the relaxing properties of tea during an office work break. It is enriching to take a break and walk out with other colleagues and just watch them have tea. These days my father has also started brewing ginger and honey tea and it has become our household early morning drink. Much like my grandfather, he arranges all the things he needs in advance at night. An inverted pan lays on the shelf, a jar of honey and 2 lemons to make 4 cups. Grandpa did all that because our kitchen had no water supply and electricity could be erratic. All this could however not make anything erratic in their routine. Just as the sun was dipping and rising out of the field, they were constant. Even if I fooled around the neighbourhood to my heart’s contentment, I would still be back home with the crawling glow worms.

It is important to consider that following a routine is one great thing we can do for ourselves in the current pandemic. This is why I have been emphasising the sense of routine we had in that household. If I was late in returning home according to myself, I would still arrive in time when my grandmother would be coming out of her evening puja. She would end the Puja a little after it was getting dark and then rise to greet us. Maintaining a routine is easier for those living in communion with nature but we can find more about our own nature and then create a custom routine. I used to overhear her conversations with grandfather in the twilight of sleep and wakefulness while sleeping next to her bed. I know that they would talk only in kind. I know that they discussed many things like the health of a neighbours’ calf, someone else’s grandchildren or discussed who all had sown peas. In case someone had not, I would be sent to their place with a packet from our patch someday. Grandmother would facilitate such exchanges with the swiftness of a PT instructor. She would sneak time in my routine and ensure that I ran the errand of delivering the parcel to the planned household. This is common in villages. Everyone lives in a complementary and connected way and it is exactly what we need today. We need to connect to our loved ones over a text or a phone call. We need to connect to distant and unrelated people also and do our part in facilitating wellness and recovery for everyone in these difficult times. As restrictions due to Covid continue or relax, we should keep ourselves involved meaningfully.“But what about tea?”, you would ask. It remains upon you to tea or not to tea.

 

Image Credits:Pxhere

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