We need to be more perceptive to the needs of girls soon to turn women
Date : 18/05/2024
The complementarity of Yin and Yang is a well-known concept we may be familiar with. When Lord Shiva underestimated the power of the Parvati, she made him come to his knees for a bowl of food. Such is the legend of Annapurna. The subtle balance always strives to be maintained in nature, but the question we need to ask is - Are we attuned and conducive enough? Do we need the wrath of another Annapurna to remind us the values by which we should live? On this National Girl Child Day, I wished we youngsters knew National Girl Child Day as concretely as we know when it is Valentine’s, and as desperately as professionals who certainly remember their leaves left for the remaining year. I understand my brother’s discomfort when his classmates (girls) get a good percentage of merit discount for admissions to Institutes of prominence within our country. I am not far from imagining a moment where small boys would ask why they don't have a Boy Child Day after them and it would be a valid thing to ask. So clearly, there is a lack of harmony in the innate balance. But ultimately, as we are a whole in this partnership of complementarities, it shall always remain a struggle to pick the right battles. We are pieces of the same assortment who need to figure out where impact lies and keep re-configuring ourselves in our individual and collective journeys accordingly.
I requested Dr. Quleen K. Bijral, Faculty at IIT Jammu to recount some of her childhood experiences that shaped her into the strong and independent woman that she is today, on this special occasion. Incidentally, it is the small things that came to her mind first that made the biggest impact. She remembered that as she used to wear shorts and sportswear bras for the game of tennis, it would be frowned upon by strangers and sometimes even family members. Not only that, she would have to play and compete with the boys as there were hardly any girls out there playing and that would also draw some flak. Herein, her grandmother who she fondly remembered as ‘Ami Ji’ and her parents really stood by her side. They would rebuke people who could not understand her ambition. In her words, “The support my parents and my Ami ji gave was always encouraging and a life-saver. It allowed me to stay strong, down-to-earth and be aware of how any excuses can be used especially against girls to pin them down and scoff at them.”
My attempt for the last few days had been to think how to imbibe more meaning into this occasion. Then I thought about the Little Red Riding Hood. Can we relate to the story of Little Red Riding Hood? Can we imagine her as a helpless little girl thriving anywhere around us and does it still remain relatable? How many seconds does it take to imagine her being helpless even in a safe environment like a school, if not a forest? Maybe a quick exposure to these questions will tell us that we cannot rest before we substantially improved her conditions. We need to be more perceptive to the long or short term needs of girls soon to turn women. I remember some of my own attempts at ensuring the safety of my peers especially women. I did my B.A. from Indraprastha College for Women at Civil Lines, New Delhi from 2011-14. It was my second year in 2012 when the gang rape case that got enshrined as Nirbhaya case happened in the month of December. Many of us had gone home as it was winter break time but the return to Delhi had become a difficult mental journey to undertake. Upon my return, I used to walk the streets around my college at different times of the day and night to see how safe the locality was. My position as the General secretary of NSS at our college had made me susceptible to the needs of differently abled fellow girl students in a new light. I learnt that they dream like our reality. I had asked one of my friends who had been born with total visual impairment how her dreams felt, she said she felt like she feels when her mother sleeps with her. That is how she dreamt her mother in a dream. I remember dressing up another of my totally vision impaired friends for a farewell party. She had been insisting me to put foundation on her as I was going to do her makeup. This friend who had not seen the colors of the world since birth knew how important shades are and that she certainly needed to conceal hers’. How long will we take to come out of this? In the movie Taare Zameen Par, nobody objects to the song Mai kabhi batlata nahin, par andhere se darta hu mai Maa, to have been picturised on the lead protagonist who is a child, but it is sung in an adult voice. It is easy to believe everyone will locate a Riding Hood in or around them, for whom they would want to build a better world. What would we choose to do on this day today and every year? Will we raise toasts, confetti or just a glass of silence?
I will end by sharing the local legend of Jammu-That of Bawa Jitto and his daughter Bua Kodi. Bua and Bobo are amongst the many terms affectionately used for girls or sisters. Grandmother can also be called Bobo in Dogri, the local tongue of the Jammu region. Jeetmal was a peasant who had tilled and farmed a very arid land. He broke the land and cropped it by sheer toil and unshakeable devotion to Maa Vaishno. The ancient legend keeps reinventing itself in the psyche of Jammuites. Jitto was harassed by his landowner who seeked excessive crop from him as tax. He was furious and instead of parting with his produce, burnt the heap of wheat with himself on it. His beloved daughter, also believed to be a roop of Vaishno herself, also joined the flames. Thus, Jeetmal became Bawa Jitto and the name of his daughter never escapes our tongue whenever he is remembered. Jitto temples have Bua’s icons always standing by his side holding hands with him. In later times it was said that the British harassed Jitto and that he killed himself with a dagger upon the heap of wheat spilling blood on the entire crop and Bua also died. Such is the innocent power and resilience that Bua Kodi began to symbolise.
Tags :
Note: Your email address will not be displayed with the comment.
.png)
Very well written article..